Women who are extra careful of who they let into their life typically had these 8 life experiences, says psychology

As an individual, it’s crucial to feel loved, respected, and secure. However, not all of us have been lucky to experience these feelings throughout our lives.

Past experiences, particularly negative ones, often shape how we approach relationships moving forward. It’s not uncommon for women who’ve dealt with challenging life situations to become increasingly selective about who they let into their lives.

This article explores women who are extra cautious about their relationships and the typical life experiences that have led them to this point.

1) They experienced betrayal

Betrayal isn’t always about being cheated on in a romantic relationship. It can take various forms, such as backstabbing from a friend, a family member’s broken promise, or a colleague taking credit for one’s work.

Often, these experiences occur subtly and progressively over time, leaving the individual feeling disillusioned and defensive.

You might notice these women are always wary of promises. Perhaps they have difficulty trusting others and constantly question people’s motives.

In other instances, they may be overly cautious in opening up or sharing their personal life. They may prefer to keep their affairs private and avoid relying on others to avoid potential disappointment or hurt.

According to psychology, this guarded behaviour is a common coping mechanism after experiencing betrayal. It’s an attempt to protect oneself from further emotional harm.

2) They’ve encountered toxic relationships

Being in a toxic relationship can have profound, long-lasting effects on an individual. These relationships are often characterized by manipulation, control, and a lack of respect for boundaries.

Women who have been in such relationships might develop a heightened sense of caution when it comes to letting new people into their lives.

They may be extremely careful about the red flags they’ve learned to associate with toxicity.

This could manifest in various ways. They might take a longer time to trust someone new, or be very particular about the kind of people they let close to them.

They may also have clear and strict boundaries which they enforce without hesitation.

This caution is often an instinctive response to avoid repeating past mistakes and getting entangled in another toxic relationship.

It’s a survival instinct kicking in, aiming to protect one’s emotional well-being from potential harm.

3) They’ve enjoyed solitude

It’s often assumed that women who are careful about who they let into their lives have always had negative experiences.

However, that’s not always the case. Sometimes, it’s the positive experience of solitude that shapes this cautious approach.

Women who have embraced solitude often discover a sense of independence and self-sufficiency. They learn to enjoy their own company, pursue their interests, and rely on themselves for happiness.

This self-fulfilling experience can make them cautious about disrupting their peace with unnecessary drama or negativity.

They might be selective about who they let in, aiming to maintain the tranquility and balance they’ve found in solitude.

This doesn’t mean they’re averse to relationships or social interactions.

Instead, they value meaningful connections and choose quality over quantity when it comes to relationships.

4) They’ve been let down

Life isn’t always kind, and we’ve all experienced moments of disappointment. But for some women, being let down by those they trusted has become a painful pattern.

Perhaps it was a parent who failed to provide the emotional support they needed growing up, or a friend who wasn’t there when they needed them most.

Maybe it was a partner who didn’t live up to their promises or a mentor who fell short of their expectations.

These repeated letdowns can leave deep emotional scars and create an inherent fear of relying on others. It’s not that these women don’t want to trust or open up; they’re just afraid of being let down again.

This fear can make them extra careful about who they let into their lives. It’s a protective mechanism, a way to safeguard their hearts from further disappointment and pain.

5) They’ve struggled with self-esteem

We all have moments of self-doubt, but for some women, struggles with self-esteem have been a significant part of their journey.

These women have had to fight hard to love and accept themselves, perhaps even harder than most.

Maybe they grew up in an environment where they were constantly criticized, or perhaps they’ve been in relationships where they were made to feel like they weren’t good enough.

These experiences can leave lasting impacts on one’s self-worth.

Having worked hard to build their self-esteem, these women are understandably careful about who they let into their lives.

They understand the value of their hard-won self-love and self-respect, and they refuse to let anyone jeopardize that.

They also seek out people who uplift them rather than bring them down, and who respect and appreciate them for who they truly are.

After all, they’ve come too far in their journey of self-love to settle for anything less.

6) They’ve learned from their past

We all have a past, a collection of experiences that have shaped us into who we are today. For some women, their past has been a tough teacher, presenting lessons wrapped in pain and heartbreak.

Maybe they’ve loved and lost, trusted and been betrayed, hoped and been disappointed.

These experiences, as difficult as they may have been, have taught them valuable lessons about people and relationships.

These women have learned the hard way that not everyone deserves a place in their lives.

They’ve learned to recognize the signs of toxicity, to differentiate between genuine and fake, and to stand up for themselves when needed.

Now, they use these lessons from their past to navigate their present and future relationships.

7) They value their peace

Sometimes, it’s as simple as this – women who are extra careful about who they let into their lives value their peace above all else.

They’ve experienced the hustle and bustle, the drama and chaos, and now they simply want peace and tranquillity. They love their quiet morning coffees, their solitary walks in the park, and the comfort of a good book on a lazy Sunday.

This isn’t to say they don’t enjoy the company of others.

On the contrary, they cherish meaningful conversations, shared laughter, and the joy of being with loved ones. But they’re selective about who they share these precious moments with.

They’ve realized that life is too short to spend it with people who disturb their peace.

So they choose to surround themselves with people who bring positivity, love, and light into their lives. After all, isn’t that what life’s all about?

8) They’ve realized their worth

Let’s be frank here, some women have had to put up with a lot of nonsense before they finally realized their worth.

They’ve tolerated disrespect, accepted less than they deserved, and put others’ needs before their own far too many times.

But there comes a point when enough is enough. A point where they look in the mirror and realize that they’re worth so much more. That they deserve respect, love, and kindness just like everyone else.

From that point on, these women become extra careful about who they let into their lives. They refuse to tolerate any behavior that undermines their self-worth.

They don’t just let anyone in anymore – you have to earn your place in their life.

And if you can’t treat them with the respect and love they deserve, they’re not afraid to show you the door.

Because they’ve learned the hard way that it’s better to be alone than to be with someone who doesn’t value them.

In conclusion

If you identify with the women we’ve discussed in this article, or if you recognize these traits in someone you know, remember: it’s okay.

Being extra careful about who you let into your life is not a flaw; it’s a strength. It means you’ve learned from your past experiences and that you value yourself and your peace of mind.