10 traits of people who are naturally good at getting what they want

I’ve always wondered about those people who just seem to have life on speed dial.

You know the ones—they glide through situations, snagging what they want with what looks like effortless grace.

For years, I thought they had some cosmic advantage, like they were born under a luckier star.

But the truth? It’s not magic, and it’s definitely not luck. It’s a mix of habits and traits that anyone can develop—if they’re willing to put in the work.

Let’s unpack the ten traits that make these people so good at getting what they want. You might just discover the secret sauce you’ve been missing.

1) They’re adaptable

Ever noticed how some people just seem to roll with the punches?

Life throws a curveball their way, and they adjust their swing accordingly.

This is adaptability – the ability to change or be changed in order to fit or work better in some situation or for some purpose.

Those who are naturally good at getting what they want have this trait in spades.

They understand that things don’t always go according to plan. Instead of resisting change, they embrace it, pivot when necessary and keep moving forward.

They know that the only constant in life is change, and they’re ready for it.

Adaptability keeps them resilient and open to new paths that may lead to their desired outcome. If you’re looking to get what you want more often, start by cultivating this trait.

2) They’re persistent

I’ll never forget the time I was trying to land my dream job. I’d been applying for months with no success.

It was discouraging, to say the least.

But here’s the thing – I didn’t give up. I tweaked my resume, prepared more thoroughly for interviews, and kept knocking on doors.

And eventually, it paid off. I landed the job I had been dreaming of.

This is persistence – the trait of continuing to try to do something even though it is difficult or other people want you to stop.

People who are good at getting what they want are persistent. They don’t let a few setbacks get them down. Instead, they see every failure as a stepping stone towards their goal.

They understand that the path to success is often littered with obstacles, and the only way to get past them is to keep moving forward.

3) They’re proactive

Being proactive is the human ability to take initiative and control of situations rather than simply reacting to them.

People who are naturally good at getting what they want are proactive. They don’t wait for opportunities to come to them, they go out and create them.

They take initiative, anticipate potential problems, and act before they happen.

In essence, proactive people don’t just react to life, they actively shape it to align with their goals.

4) They’re confident

Ever noticed how some people just carry themselves with a certain air?

It’s like they walk into a room and everyone just knows they mean business.

Confidence is a massive part of getting what you want. The belief in your own abilities can take you places that doubt never will.

People who are naturally good at getting what they want exude confidence.

They believe in their abilities and know their worth, which often influences others to see their value as well.

This doesn’t mean they’re overconfident or arrogant. Instead, they have a healthy self-esteem that allows them to take risks and face challenges head-on.

5) They’re good listeners

You might think that getting what you want means being assertive and persuasive. But let me tell you, being a good listener is just as important.

Those who naturally excel at getting what they want understand the value of listening.

They know that by truly hearing and understanding others, they can build stronger relationships, gain valuable insights, and create win-win situations.

Good listeners don’t just hear the words being spoken, they understand the emotions and intentions behind them.

This ability helps them to respond effectively and work towards their goals in a way that also respects the needs and wishes of others.

If you want to get better at achieving your desires, start by improving your listening skills. It might be more powerful than you think.

6) They show empathy

Having the capacity to understand and feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, that’s empathy.

And it’s a trait that people who are good at getting what they want often have.

Empathy allows them to connect with others on a deeper level.

It helps them understand the needs, desires, and fears of those around them.

By understanding others, they are able to navigate relationships more effectively and work towards their goals in a way that also considers the wellbeing of others.

Being empathetic doesn’t mean disregarding your own needs or always putting others before yourself. But it does mean being considerate and respectful of others’ feelings and perspectives.

If we all practiced a little more empathy, not only would we be better at getting what we want, but we’d also create a more compassionate world.

Now isn’t that a goal worth striving for?

7) They’re not afraid of failure

There was a time when I was terrified of failing.

I would avoid taking risks or trying new things out of fear that I wouldn’t succeed. But I’ve since realized that this fear was holding me back.

People who are naturally good at getting what they want aren’t afraid of failure. In fact, they see it as an essential part of the journey to success.

They understand that every failure is an opportunity to learn and grow. Instead of seeing it as a dead end, they see it as a detour or a stepping stone on the path to achieving their goals.

Don’t be afraid of failure. Embrace it, learn from it, and use it to propel you forward on your journey to getting what you want.

8) They know when to say no

While it may seem like saying yes to every opportunity is the best way to get what you want, the opposite can often be true.

People who are good at getting what they want understand the value of saying no.

They recognize that time and energy are finite resources and that not every opportunity aligns with their goals.

By saying no to things that don’t serve them, they free up time and energy for the things that truly matter. They set boundaries and prioritize their needs, which allows them to focus on their goals more effectively.

While it might feel like you’re closing a door by saying no, you could actually be opening up a pathway to what you really want.

9) They’re patient

In a world where instant gratification is often the norm, patience can seem like a forgotten virtue.

But let me tell you, it’s absolutely crucial when it comes to getting what you want.

Those who naturally excel at achieving their desires understand that good things take time. They’re willing to put in the work and wait for the results, understanding that success rarely happens overnight.

Patience allows them to stay focused and committed to their goals, even when progress seems slow or setbacks occur. It keeps them from making hasty decisions that could derail their success.

10) They believe in themselves

Above all, people who are good at getting what they want believe in themselves. They trust in their abilities, their judgement, and their potential.

This belief fuels their determination and propels them forward, even in the face of obstacles or setbacks.

If you don’t believe in yourself, it can be hard to convince others to believe in you. But when you have self-belief, it radiates from you, inspiring others and attracting opportunities.

Final thought: It’s in your hands

Here’s the thing: getting what you want isn’t a game of chance, and it doesn’t require a magic wand.

It requires leaning into traits that set you up for success—traits like persistence, adaptability, and maybe learning to say no a little more often than you say yes.

None of this happens overnight, but that’s the beauty of it. You get to chip away at these habits, little by little, until they feel like second nature.

Because honestly, there’s nothing more empowering than realizing you’ve been holding the reins all along.

So take stock—what’s one trait you can work on today?

Maybe it’s self-belief. Maybe it’s being a little more patient with yourself. Whatever it is, remember this: you’re not waiting for someone to hand you the keys.

You’ve had them in your pocket the whole time.