Your body language and actions often speak louder than words, especially in public settings.
For those struggling with low self-esteem, certain behaviors can unintentionally reveal their insecurities to others.
Recognizing these habits is the first step toward building confidence and projecting self-assurance.
In this article, we’ll explore seven things you might be doing in public that instantly signal low self-esteem—and how to shift them for a more confident presence:
1) Excessive apologizing
We’ve all encountered that person who says sorry for everything, even when it’s clearly not their fault.
This excessive apologizing often comes from a place of low self-esteem.
It’s as if they’re perpetually walking on eggshells, trying to avoid upsetting anyone or causing any inconvenience.
In reality, it’s a subconscious admission of undeservingness.
They feel like they’re always in the way or doing something wrong.
If you find yourself constantly saying “sorry” for every little thing, you might be publicly displaying your low self-esteem without even realizing it.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes and it’s okay to stand your ground when you know you’re not at fault. After all, you’re only human.
2) Avoiding eye contact
I remember when I was younger, I struggled with maintaining eye contact during conversations.
Whenever I found myself in a social situation, I would constantly shift my gaze, focusing on anything but the person I was talking to.
It wasn’t because I wasn’t interested in what they had to say, but because I lacked confidence.
Avoiding eye contact is a common sign of low self-esteem; it suggests you’re uncomfortable in your own skin and uncertain about your worth in the interaction.
Eye contact is a powerful way to show engagement and confidence.
So, practice holding someone’s gaze next time, and see the difference it can make.
3) Negative body language
Body language can be a powerful, non-verbal indicator of how someone feels about themselves.
Research indicates that people with low self-esteem often exhibit “closed” body language.
This includes crossed arms, hunched shoulders, and lack of spatial presence.
They tend to make themselves smaller as though trying to minimize their presence in a room.
This physical withdrawal is reflective of their internal feelings of unworthiness and insignificance.
Conversely, adopting open and confident postures can actually help boost your self-esteem over time.
4) Seeking constant validation
Constantly seeking approval or validation from others is another sign of low self-esteem.
It’s natural to appreciate recognition for our accomplishments, but if you find yourself in a constant need for others to validate your worth, it might be a sign of underlying self-esteem issues.
This can manifest in different ways—constantly asking for reassurance, fishing for compliments or making self-depreciating remarks hoping someone will contradict them.
The key is to realize that your value does not depend on external validation.
You are enough just as you are—believe in your own worth and learn to validate yourself.
5) Difficulty accepting compliments
There was a time when I couldn’t accept a compliment without feeling uncomfortable or dismissing it outright.
A simple “You did a great job” would be met with “Oh, it was nothing really”, or “I could have done better”.
Difficulty in accepting compliments is a telltale sign of low self-esteem—it’s as if you don’t believe you’re worthy of the praise, or are afraid that accepting it will make you seem arrogant.
But here’s the thing: Compliments are gifts of words from others, recognizing your efforts or qualities and discarding them is like refusing a kind gesture.
The next time someone compliments you, try accepting it with grace and gratitude. It’s okay to acknowledge your strengths and accomplishments.
6) Overcompensating with arrogance
Sometimes, low self-esteem can manifest itself in the form of arrogance or overconfidence.
This is often a defense mechanism to hide insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.
If you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth by boasting about your achievements or belittling others, it might be a sign that underneath, you’re dealing with low self-esteem.
Remember, true confidence comes from accepting ourselves as we are—strengths and weaknesses included.
It’s about being comfortable in our skin, not about proving ourselves to others.
7) Avoiding personal questions or sharing about yourself
If you’re constantly dodging personal questions or avoiding sharing about yourself, it might be a sign of low self-esteem.
This avoidance often comes from a fear of judgment or rejection.
You might feel like your life isn’t interesting enough, or that people wouldn’t care about your experiences or opinions.
Your story matters; your experiences and perspectives are uniquely yours and they add value to the conversations and relationships you have with others.
Embrace who you are, and don’t be afraid to let others see the real you.
Final thoughts: The journey to self-love
Understanding the signs of low self-esteem is the first step towards self-improvement.
But it’s important to remember that everyone, at some point, struggles with self-doubt and insecurities.
The renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
Embracing this paradox could be your most powerful tool in overcoming low self-esteem.
It’s about acknowledging your vulnerabilities, understanding your worth, and giving yourself the love and respect you deserve.
The journey to self-love might not always be easy, but it’s worth every step.
Because when you start valuing yourself, you start reflecting that value in your actions and interactions, transforming not just how you view yourself, but also how the world views you.
Embrace your journey, be kind to yourself and remember—you are enough, just as you are!
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