The art of being alone: 9 signs you’re truly happy being single

Embracing solitude is an art that not many of us can master. Being alone, contrary to popular belief, does not equate to loneliness. In fact, it can be a powerful tool for self-growth and creativity.

For some, being single is a lifestyle choice that allows them to focus on their personal goals and passions. It’s about taking full ownership of one’s life and making conscious decisions that align with one’s values, rather than depending on others for happiness or validation.

Recognizing the signs of being genuinely content with singleness is important. It’s not just about being okay with being alone, it’s about finding joy and fulfillment in your own company.

Here are nine signs that you’re not just surviving singlehood, but truly thriving in it.

1) You enjoy your own company

The first and perhaps most telling sign that you’re truly content with being single is that you genuinely enjoy spending time alone. This doesn’t mean that you reject social interactions entirely, but rather that you appreciate the value of solitude.

In our society, we often mistake being alone for loneliness. But in truth, spending time alone can be a deeply fulfilling and empowering experience. It’s an opportunity to dive deeper into our own thoughts, to challenge ourselves, and to express our creativity without constraints or judgments.

When you’re happy being single, spending time by yourself isn’t a compromise – it’s a choice. You look forward to those quiet moments where you can simply be with your thoughts and engage in activities that you love, without relying on others for entertainment or validation.

This ability to find happiness in your own company is a clear sign of personal growth and resilience. It indicates that you’ve taken the time to confront your fears of being alone and have discovered the joy and freedom that comes from embracing solitude. It’s a sign that you’re not just okay with being single, but rather that you’re thriving in it.

2) Self-improvement is a priority

Another clear sign that you’re genuinely happy being single is that self-improvement has become a priority in your life. When you’re comfortable being alone, you see it as an opportunity to work on yourself without any distractions.

This could take many forms. Perhaps you dedicate time to cultivating new skills or pursuing a passion. Maybe you’ve embarked on a journey of self-discovery, constantly challenging your own assumptions and beliefs. For others, it’s about taking steps towards physical wellness through regular exercise and a healthy diet.

No matter the form, this dedication to self-growth is an indication that you’re using your singlehood as a chance to become the best version of yourself. And this pursuit is driven by an internal motivation rather than external pressure.

As the renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” This quote perfectly captures the essence of this point. Being truly at peace with being single means valuing the journey of self-improvement over the destination of a relationship.

3) You don’t seek validation from others

A further sign that you’re truly happy being single is that you don’t seek validation from others. You don’t need someone else to tell you that you’re worthy, attractive, or successful. Instead, your sense of self-worth comes from within.

This doesn’t mean you’re immune to feedback or criticism. Rather, it means that your self-esteem is not dependent on other people’s opinions of you. You can listen to their views, consider them thoughtfully, but ultimately make your own decisions about what is right for you.

In my video on the illusion of happiness, I discuss how true contentment comes from within, by embracing life’s challenges, fostering meaningful relationships, and staying true to oneself. This extends to our relationship with ourselves – we can be our own source of validation and acceptance.

YouTube video

4) You embrace your freedom

A key sign of genuine contentment in singlehood is embracing the freedoms it offers. While relationships can be fulfilling, they inevitably come with compromises. As a single individual, you have the unique opportunity to live life on your own terms.

This means you get to make decisions that align solely with your values and desires, without having to consider another person’s preferences or needs. You have the freedom to pursue your passions, explore new interests, and take risks that might be more challenging within the constraints of a relationship.

This isn’t about being selfish or disregarding others. Rather, it’s about recognizing the value of personal autonomy and using it as a force for positive change in your life.

In line with one of my core beliefs, I see this freedom as an opportunity to cultivate a sense of purpose, creativity, and ethical participation in the world around us. It’s not about running away from commitments but about embracing the possibilities that come with being single.

This kind of freedom is empowering. It enables you to shape your life in a way that aligns with your deepest values, further solidifying your contentment with being single.

5) You’re investing in your personal growth

Being truly happy being single often means that you’re heavily investing in your personal growth. You understand that the most important relationship you have is with yourself, and you’re committed to nurturing that relationship.

This commitment manifests itself in various ways. You may be doing the inner work to confront your fears, challenging limiting beliefs, and cultivating self-compassion. Or, you may be focusing on developing new skills, expanding your knowledge, or exploring new hobbies.

Through this process, you become more self-aware, more resilient, and more capable of creating the life you desire. This focus on self-growth is not only a sign of being happy with being single; it’s also a powerful catalyst for positive change.

In line with one of my core beliefs, I see this commitment to personal growth as a testament to the transformative power of self-awareness. It’s about taking responsibility for your own development and using it as a tool to shape your life in a way that aligns with your values and aspirations.

6) You’re open to love

Ironically, being truly happy in your singlehood often means that you’re open to love. This might sound contradictory, but it’s rooted in the understanding that being open to love and being content with being single are not mutually exclusive.

When you’re genuinely happy being single, you aren’t actively seeking a relationship out of desperation or loneliness. Instead, you’re open to the possibilities of love, should it come your way. You’re ready to welcome a partner who aligns with your values and enriches your life, not someone who completes or validates you.

This openness comes from a place of strength and self-assuredness. You know that you’re whole as you are and that a relationship would be an addition to your life, not a requirement for your happiness.

This perspective is in line with one of my core beliefs – that true empowerment comes from taking full responsibility for our lives. Being open to love while being content with singlehood is a manifestation of this belief. It’s about knowing your worth and being secure in your individuality while also acknowledging the potential joy and growth that a relationship can bring.

7) You have strong and fulfilling relationships

While being single means you’re not in a romantic relationship, it doesn’t mean you’re isolated or lacking connection. In fact, being truly happy being single often means that you have strong and fulfilling relationships in other areas of your life, such as friendships, family ties, or professional networks.

You value these relationships deeply and invest time and energy in nurturing them. You understand that these connections provide a sense of belonging, shared joy, and mutual support, which are all essential to our wellbeing.

This focus on cultivating authentic relationships aligns with one of my core beliefs: the profound importance of supportive communities. You understand that our connections with others are not just about finding companionship but also about building a network of individuals who inspire us, challenge us, and enrich our lives in countless ways.

8) You are at peace with uncertainty

Another telling sign that you’re truly content with being single is your ability to be at peace with uncertainty. The future of your relationship status is not set in stone, and that’s perfectly okay with you.

This acceptance of uncertainty is not about being passive or indifferent. Rather, it reflects your understanding that life is inherently unpredictable and that this unpredictability can be a source of excitement and growth.

This perspective aligns with one of my core beliefs – that obstacles and setbacks are opportunities for growth and learning. Being at peace with the uncertainty of your single status is an embodiment of this belief. It shows that you’re capable of embracing the unknown and turning it into an opportunity for self-discovery and personal growth.

9) You’re living life on your own terms

Finally, being truly happy being single means living life on your own terms. You’re not bound by societal expectations or pressures to be in a relationship. Instead, you’re choosing to live a life that aligns with your values, aspirations, and needs.

Living life on your own terms is about asserting your autonomy and making choices that resonate with your true self. This can range from making career decisions, choosing where to live, deciding how to spend your time, or determining who you want in your life.

This approach to life is a reflection of my core belief in the importance of personal freedom and authenticity. It’s about taking responsibility for your life and shaping it in a way that is true to who you are. Being single offers a unique opportunity to do exactly that – to live a life that truly belongs to you.

The Beauty in Being Single

The journey and joy of being single have deep-rooted connections with our personal growth and self-awareness.

The signs we’ve explored are not mere indications of being okay with singlehood. They signify a profound understanding of oneself and a sense of contentment that transcends societal norms. These signs reflect a commitment to personal growth, an embrace of freedom, and the courage to live life on one’s own terms.

Being truly happy being single doesn’t mean you’re closing doors to love or relationships. Instead, it means you’re opening up to life’s possibilities and finding joy in your own company. You’re choosing to invest in your growth, nurture meaningful relationships, and explore the beauty of uncertainty.

Whether it’s diving deep into self-reflection, exploring new hobbies, or nurturing friendships, you are shaping your unique journey towards self-contentment.

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Justin Brown

Justin Brown is an entrepreneur and thought leader in personal development and digital media, with a foundation in education from The London School of Economics and The Australian National University. As the co-founder of Ideapod, The Vessel, and a director at Brown Brothers Media, Justin has spearheaded platforms that significantly contribute to personal and collective growth. His deep insights are shared on his YouTube channel, JustinBrownVids, offering a rich blend of guidance on living a meaningful and purposeful life.

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