Living life on your own terms can seem like a daunting task, right?
You’ve got societal expectations, peer pressure, and the nagging voice in the back of your head listing all the what ifs.
But guess what? There are people out there who do it daily. They march to the beat of their own drum, shrug off the naysayers and create their own path.
What’s their secret? How do they keep living life on their own terms day after day?
Well, it’s all thanks to a set of habits that help them live a fulfilled life, a stoic life, regardless of external pressures.
In this article, we’re going to explore those 8 stoic habits that people who live life on their own terms swear by.
No fluff, no over-the-top promises. Just real, practical habits that you can start implementing today.
Get ready to bust some long-held beliefs and embrace a new approach to life on your own terms.
1) Living in accordance with nature
Ever noticed how some people seem to be in sync with the world around them? Like they’ve tapped into some secret rhythm of life?
Well, it’s not magic. It’s a stoic habit called living in accordance with nature.
This doesn’t mean camping out in the wilderness (though you could, if that’s your thing).
It simply means understanding your place in the world, accepting it, and working with it rather than against it.
It’s about acknowledging that there are things outside of your control and focusing on what you can control – your actions, your responses, your attitude.
Practicing this habit helps to strip away the stress and anxiety that come from trying to force things to go your way.
Instead, you learn to flow with the currents of life, making decisions and taking actions that align with your own values and beliefs, not someone else’s.
People who live life on their own terms are masters at this. They have a deep sense of self-awareness and a profound respect for the world around them.
They understand that they are part of a larger whole and they make choices that reflect this understanding.
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2) Practicing self-discipline
Now, here comes the tricky part: self-discipline. After all, it’s one thing to understand your place in the world, and it’s a whole other thing to actually live in accordance with it.
I remember when I first decided to embark on this stoic journey. I’d read about living in accordance with nature and thought “Yeah, I can do that.” But then came the moment of truth.
I was working a job I hated, wasting my time on things that didn’t matter to me, all because it was what was expected of me. I knew I wasn’t living true to myself. But changing that? It was daunting.
Discipline is not just about getting up early or sticking to a fitness regime.
It’s about making tough choices and standing by them. It’s about resisting the urge to fall back into old habits and patterns that don’t serve you.
So, I quit my job. Not without a plan, of course. I’d been practicing guitar on the side and had started giving lessons in my free time. It wasn’t easy, and there were a lot of uncertain times, but it was mine.
It was the first big step I took in truly living life on my own terms. And every day since then has been a testament to the power of self-discipline.
It’s not just about control; it’s about freedom – the freedom to choose your own path and walk it with confidence.
3) Embracing the power of perspective
There’s a quote by Wayne Dyer that says, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
Think about it for a second. It’s simple, but oh so powerful.
I used to get bogged down by every little hiccup in life. A delayed train, a rude comment, a rainy day – it all seemed like the universe was conspiring against me.
But then I stumbled upon this quote. And it hit me like a wave. I realized that it wasn’t the universe that was the problem; it was my perspective.
You see, the stoics believed in the power of perspective. They understood that our thoughts and attitudes shape our experiences.
The train delay? It became an opportunity to read a few more pages of my book.
The rude comment? A reminder that everyone has bad days and it’s not always about me.
The rainy day? A chance to enjoy a cozy cup of tea at home.
When you start viewing challenges as opportunities, setbacks as lessons, and negativity as nothing more than passing clouds, you gain an incredible sense of control over your life.
It’s not just about seeing the silver lining but understanding that every cloud, no matter how dark, is temporary. That’s living life on your own terms – acknowledging the storms but never letting them steer your ship.
4) Living in the present
Human beings are the only species that can mentally live in the past, present, and future. That’s fascinating to think about, right?
We can reminisce about the past, plan for the future, and simultaneously experience the present. While this ability is certainly a marvel of evolution, it can also be our downfall if not managed correctly.
A major part of stoicism is about living in the present moment.
It’s about understanding that the past is gone, the future isn’t promised and all we truly have is the here and now.
I’ve found this to be incredibly liberating.
Instead of dwelling on past mistakes or anxiously anticipating future events, I’ve learned to engage fully with the present.
By living in the present, we free ourselves from the shackles of regret and worry.
We become better equipped to handle life’s ups and downs because we’re focused on dealing with them as they come, not as they might have been or could be.
This is how people who live life on their own terms operate – they embrace the present moment, acknowledging it as the only space where life truly happens.
5) Accepting what you cannot control
Now, we’ve spoken about living in the present and shifting our perspective. But let’s be real, life can still throw us some serious curveballs.
Unexpected changes, disappointments, loss – they’re all part of the human experience. And it’s natural to feel upset, angry, or scared when they happen.
But here’s where another stoic habit comes into play: accepting what we cannot control.
It’s a tough pill to swallow, I know. I’ve been there. When my father fell ill, I felt helpless and frustrated. But then I remembered the stoic teachings.
I could not control his illness. But I could control how I responded to it. I could control my actions – visiting him in the hospital, making him laugh, being there for my mother.
Accepting what we cannot control is not about being passive or giving up. It’s about focusing our energy on what we can do, on what is within our power.
People who live life on their own terms understand this. They don’t waste time fretting over uncontrollable circumstances; instead, they channel their efforts into areas where they can make a difference.
It’s a liberating approach to life, one that enables us to navigate its ups and downs with grace and resilience.
6) Embracing continuous learning
With acceptance comes another important stoic habit: continuous learning. Life is a teacher, and every experience, good or bad, brings its own lessons.
Stoics believed in the power of wisdom, and so do people who live life on their own terms. They read, they ask questions, they listen. They remain students of life, always eager to learn and grow.
This habit goes beyond acquiring information. It’s about understanding life better, about gaining insights into our own nature and the world around us.
7) Practicing gratitude
After we’ve learned to live in the present, accept what we can’t control, and embrace continuous learning, it’s time to look at another crucial stoic habit: practicing gratitude.
It’s easy to get caught up in what’s wrong with our lives or what we lack. But when we stop and take stock of what we have, it can be a real game-changer.
I started keeping a gratitude journal a few years ago. Every night before bed, I jot down three things I’m thankful for. It could be as simple as a good cup of coffee or as profound as a loved one’s health.
What I’ve noticed is that this simple act shifts my focus from lack to abundance. It makes me appreciate the everyday blessings that I often took for granted.
People who live life on their own terms know the power of gratitude. They know that appreciating what they have brings contentment and wards off the dissatisfaction that comes from constantly wanting more.
It’s about living life with an abundance mindset, one where there’s always something to be thankful for.
8) Cultivating inner peace
Having touched on gratitude, it’s time to highlight one of the most profound habits of stoicism and people who live life on their own terms: cultivating inner peace.
It’s the ability to find calm within yourself, regardless of the chaos that might be happening around you. It’s about understanding that peace is a state of mind, not a state of the world.
I can’t tell you how much this habit has transformed my life. In the face of adversity, I’ve learned to retreat to this peaceful place within myself. It’s my sanctuary, my safe space.
But cultivating inner peace doesn’t mean avoiding or denying negative emotions. Instead, it involves acknowledging these feelings and then letting them pass without letting them disturb your inner calm.
It’s like being in the eye of the storm – you’re aware of the turmoil around you, but you remain unshaken.
People who live life on their own terms have mastered this art. They know that life will have its storms, but they don’t let these storms disturb their inner peace.
By cultivating inner peace, you gain a kind of resilience and strength that’s not easily shaken. It allows you to face life’s challenges with a calm mind and a steady heart – truly living life on your own terms.
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