8 relationship red flags 95% of people tend to ignore, according to psychology

When you’re in love, it’s easy to overlook things that, deep down, you know might not be right.

The excitement, the connection, the butterflies—they can cloud your judgment and make you ignore red flags that could be warning signs of bigger issues down the road.

It’s not that we want to ignore them; it’s just that love has a way of making us feel invincible, convinced that everything will work out.

In this article, I’ll reveal 8 red flags that most people tend to overlook, according to psychology. Recognizing them early could be the key to saving your relationship—or protecting yourself from one that isn’t meant to be.

1) Unresolved past issues

One of the most common red flags I see in relationships is unresolved past issues.

We all have baggage, that’s a given. But when old wounds and grievances are carried into a new relationship, it can spell trouble.

These unresolved issues can trigger irrational behaviors and reactions, creating unnecessary conflict and strain in the relationship.

Even so, most people tend to ignore this red flag. It’s easier to turn a blind eye and hope for the best than to confront these tricky issues head-on.

As hard as it might be, addressing these past issues is crucial for building a healthy relationship. Ignoring them won’t make them disappear, trust me.

2) Lack of communication

You’ve probably heard this before, but it’s worth repeating: Communication is key in a relationship.

We often assume our partners know what we’re thinking or feeling without us having to say a word. But let’s be honest, folks, we’re not mind-readers.

If you or your partner are struggling to express your thoughts and feelings openly and honestly, or if there are more silences than conversations, consider this a major red flag.

But here’s the thing – most of us dismiss this as just a ‘phase’ or a personality trait and choose to ignore it.

Take it from me, ignoring this issue won’t solve it. Open and honest communication is the bedrock of any lasting relationship.

So if it’s missing, it’s time to take a step back and reassess.

3) Codependency

Moving on, let’s talk about a term that’s often thrown around in relationship discussions – codependency.

Codependency can be a subtle yet damaging relationship dynamic where one person relies excessively on the other for their emotional or psychological well-being.

It’s like the two of you are glued together, and not in a good way.

In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I delve deeper into this topic.

If your happiness is solely dependent on your partner’s mood or if you find it hard to make decisions without them, you might be in a codependent relationship.

Despite its toxicity, 95% of people tend to ignore this red flag. It’s often mistaken for deep love or attachment. But trust me, it’s not.

Addressing codependency is crucial for cultivating a healthy, balanced relationship. It’s not always easy to break free from these patterns, but it’s definitely worth the effort. And my book can guide you through the process – it’s just a click away!

4) Constant agreement

Here’s one that might surprise you – constant agreement.

Yes, you read that right. While harmony in a relationship is important, constantly agreeing with each other can actually be a red flag.

Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and understanding, which includes respecting each other’s individual opinions and perspectives. If your partner agrees with everything you say, it may indicate a lack of individuality or fear of conflict.

Sure, it feels good when our partners agree with us all the time. But in reality, it could mean they’re suppressing their own thoughts and feelings to avoid disagreements.

In fact, most people mistake this for compatibility and ignore the underlying issue.

It might be counterintuitive, but occasional disagreements are healthy in a relationship. They foster:

• Growth
• Understanding
• Open communication

So next time your partner disagrees with you, embrace it. It’s a sign of a healthy relationship!

5) Lack of personal space

Now, let’s talk about something close to my heart – personal space.

I’m a firm believer that everyone needs a little ‘me’ time, even when in a relationship. It’s essential for maintaining your individuality and mental health.

But if your partner is always around, always checking in, or gets upset when you want some time to yourself, consider this a red flag. It could indicate possessiveness or insecurity.

Despite its importance, most people tend to overlook the need for personal space in a relationship. We often mistake it for being ‘loved’ or ‘wanted’, when it’s actually suffocating.

Remember, folks, absence makes the heart grow fonder. It’s okay to have separate hobbies, interests and friends in a relationship. In fact, it’s healthy and necessary.

6) Emotional manipulation

Emotional manipulation is a big, bright red flag that’s often ignored in relationships.y

You might be dealing with an emotional manipulator if your partner frequently:

• Uses guilt trips
• Plays the victim
• Twists your words to their advantag

This can be a hard pill to swallow. After all, no one wants to believe their partner is manipulating them. But ignoring this behavior won’t make it go away.

Trust me, it’s better to acknowledge this painful truth than to turn a blind eye. Emotional manipulation can leave deep emotional scars and affect your self-esteem.

If you feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells or second-guessing yourself, it’s time to confront this red flag head-on.

7) Lack of support

Let’s move on to a red flag that’s subtle but significant – lack of support.

In a relationship, you should always feel like your partner has your back, whether you’re celebrating a victory or confronting a challenge.

If your partner is noticeably absent during tough times or fails to celebrate your achievements, it’s a red flag. It could indicate a lack of empathy or commitment.

I’ve seen many people, including some of my closest friends, ignore this sign. They make excuses for their partners and convince themselves it’s not a big deal. But trust me, it is.

Support is the backbone of any strong relationship. If it’s missing, it’s time to have a serious conversation with your partner.

8) Verbal or physical abuse

Finally, and most importantly, let’s address the red flag that should never, ever be ignored – verbal or physical abuse.

Let me be clear. Abuse, in any form, has no place in a relationship.

If your partner belittles you, calls you names, or worse, becomes physically violent, it’s not only a red flag – it’s a deal-breaker. This kind of behavior is toxic and damaging on so many levels.

Sadly, many people rationalize this behavior, often blaming themselves for their partner’s actions. But let me tell you something – it’s not your fault.

Abuse is never okay. It’s not a sign of love or passion. It’s a sign of control and disrespect.

If you’re in an abusive relationship, please reach out to someone you trust or a professional helpline. You’re not alone in this and there are people ready to help you. It’s never too late to seek help and start healing.

Final thoughts

Recognizing relationship red flags can be tough, especially when emotions are involved. But by being aware of these warning signs, you’re giving yourself the chance to make healthier choices and protect your heart.

Don’t ignore these red flags out of fear or convenience. It’s better to confront issues head-on than let them fester and damage your relationship in the long run.

I know it’s not always easy. But remember, you’re not alone in this journey. If you’re dealing with some of these issues, especially codependency, I’d encourage you to check out my book Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship.

It’s packed with practical advice and strategies to help you navigate these complex relationship dynamics. Because at the end of the day, you deserve a relationship that brings you joy and fulfillment, not stress and uncertainty.