As we get older, there’s a natural pull toward living more authentically—shedding what doesn’t feel true to who we are.
Maybe you’ve felt it, too: that urge to simplify, to focus on what really matters, and to let go of anything that no longer serves you.
Living an authentic life isn’t about perfection; it’s about aligning with your values and embracing the real you.
In this article, we’ll look at seven common habits that hold us back from being our truest selves. Saying goodbye to these can help you create a life that feels genuinely yours.
It’s time to clear the clutter and make room for a more meaningful path forward.
1) Letting go of the need for approval
As we age, one of the most liberating things we can do is to let go of our need for approval from others.
How often do we find ourselves doing things to please others, rather than doing what truly makes us happy?
This need for approval can often lead us to live lives that are not entirely our own.
It’s time to change that.
Living a more authentic life means standing in your own truth, even when it’s not popular or pleasing to others. It means living by your values and beliefs, not someone else’s.
So, the next time you find yourself seeking validation from others, pause for a moment. Ask yourself, “Am I doing this because I want to or because I want others to approve of me?”
2) Holding onto past regrets
Growing older often brings a suitcase full of past experiences and, unfortunately, some regrets.
Let me share something personal.
Years ago, I made a decision to pass up on a job opportunity that seemed great on the surface. It promised:
- More money
- A big title
- A chance to live in a city I’d always dreamed of
But something didn’t feel right.
I turned it down, and for years, I regretted that decision. I kept thinking about the ‘what ifs’ and ‘if onlys’. It was draining and filled me with self-doubt.
But here’s what I’ve realized.
Regret is like an anchor holding us back. It prevents us from moving forward and living in the present moment. We can’t change the past, but we can learn from it.
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So, I decided to let go of that regret.
Instead of seeing it as a missed opportunity, I chose to see it as a decision that led me down a different, but equally fulfilling path.
Learn from your past regrets, but don’t let them define your present or future. It’s never too late to start anew.
3) Being busy all the time
We live in a world that glorifies busyness. Society tends to equate busyness with being important or successful. But here’s a truth we often forget: being busy does not always mean being productive or fulfilled.
I used to fill my schedule to the brim, thinking that was the key to getting ahead in life.
And yes, I achieved some of my goals, but at what cost? I was constantly exhausted and stressed and felt like I was on a never-ending hamster wheel.
Then it hit me.
Life is not a race. It’s a journey meant to be savored and enjoyed, not rushed through. Being constantly busy robs us of the joy of living in the present moment.
So, I chose to:
- Slow down
- Say ‘no’ when necessary
- Prioritize quality over quantity
And guess what? It didn’t make me less successful or less important. If anything, it made me more present and more in tune with what truly mattered to me.
There’s more to life than crossing things off a to-do list. Make time for rest, for joy, and for the things that truly light you up inside.
4) Not setting boundaries
The truth is, we often go through life without setting clear boundaries. We:
- Say ‘yes’ when we want to say ‘no’
- Take on more than we can handle
- End up feeling overwhelmed and resentful
Setting boundaries is not about being selfish or rude. It’s about respecting your own needs, time, and mental health. It’s about giving yourself permission to put your well-being first.
When I first started setting boundaries, it was tough. I was worried about upsetting others or coming across as selfish.
But you know what? The world didn’t end. People adjusted, and more importantly, I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
As we age, it’s important to remember that it’s okay to set boundaries. It’s okay to prioritize self-care.
Living an authentic life means standing up for yourself and your needs, even if it might disappoint others.
5) Avoiding change
It’s ingrained in our human nature to be wary of change. We find comfort in familiarity and routine.
But guess what? Change is the only constant in life.
A study from Harvard Business Review revealed that people who embrace change are more likely to succeed and feel satisfied with their lives. This is because they’re not afraid to step out of their comfort zone and grow.
I used to be resistant to change. Stuck in my ways, scared of the unknown.
But over time, I’ve learned that change, while uncomfortable, often leads to growth and new opportunities.
As we get older, it’s important to stay open and adaptable. To not fear change, but welcome it as a chance for growth and self-discovery.
6) Comparing yourself to others
In this digital age, it’s so easy to fall into the comparison trap.
Scrolling through social media, we’re bombarded with images of people living seemingly perfect lives.
But here’s a gentle reminder: what we see online is often a curated highlight reel, not the whole story.
I’ve been there myself.
Caught up in comparing my behind-the-scenes with others’ highlight reels, feeling like I was falling behind or not doing enough.
It took a toll on my self-esteem and happiness.
But then I realized something important.
Every one of us is on our own unique journey with our own timeline and milestones. Your journey is not a race against others but a journey to be the best version of yourself.
7) Ignoring self-care
Self-care is not a luxury, it’s a necessity. Yet, so many of us neglect it, thinking it’s selfish or indulgent.
Neglecting self-care doesn’t serve anyone.
It leads to burnout, and stress, and can even impact our health.
On the other hand, taking care of ourselves enables us to show up as our best selves for the people we care about.
As we get older, prioritizing self-care becomes even more crucial. It’s about nurturing our physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing.
The final thought
Letting go of these habits is like peeling back the layers to reveal who you really are—a person driven by purpose, values, and authenticity.
As you move forward, remember that an authentic life is built one small choice at a time.
So, say goodbye to what no longer serves you, and make space for a life that feels truly, deeply yours.
It’s time to live with intention, honesty, and a spirit that grows ever brighter with each passing year; it’s time to do it for yourself.
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