If you really want to become a better leader, say goodbye to these 8 habits

As a leader, I’ve been there—putting in the effort, yet feeling like I’m not getting the respect I deserve from my team.

It can be frustrating, especially when you’re giving it your all, but things just don’t seem to click.

Over time, I realized that leadership isn’t just about managing tasks or making decisions—it’s about earning trust and respect from those you lead.

And sometimes, the habits we unknowingly carry are the very things that prevent us from gaining that respect.

In this article, I’ll share 8 habits that I had to let go of to truly become a better leader.

These subtle behaviors might be holding you back too, but once you recognize them and make a change, you’ll see your leadership—and your team’s respect—transform.

1) Letting ego lead the way

Leadership isn’t about being the smartest, the best, or always being right. It’s about guiding a team towards a common goal.

But sometimes our egos get in the way.

We start to think that because we’re in charge, we have all the answers.

This can lead to dismissive behavior, shutting down ideas from others, and creating an environment where people are afraid to voice their thoughts.

When ego takes over, it stifles creativity, hampers collaboration and ultimately, cripples your ability to lead effectively.

So if you’re serious about improving your leadership skills, it’s time to check your ego at the door.

Recognize that everyone on your team has something valuable to contribute and their input can lead to better results.

2) Ignoring feedback

Oh boy, have I learned this one the hard way.

Years back, I was leading a project within our company. I was confident, maybe even a little overconfident. I felt like I had all the answers and didn’t bother to ask for feedback from my team.

Long story short, the project didn’t go as planned. We missed our deadline and went over budget.

In the aftermath, I finally asked my team for their thoughts. It turned out that they had spotted some potential issues early on, but felt unable to voice them due to my dismissive attitude.

That was a wake-up call for me.

I realized that ignoring feedback was not just a bad habit, it was a leadership failure.

Since then, I’ve made a conscious effort to ask for and appreciate feedback from my team. And you know what? It has made me a much better leader.

So if you’re not actively seeking feedback from your team, it’s time to start. You’ll be surprised how much you can learn and improve.

3) Micro-managing

As a leader, it’s natural to want things done a certain way. But did you know that excessive micro-managing can actually damage your team’s productivity?

Studies have shown that when employees feel constantly monitored and controlled, their stress levels rise while their job satisfaction plummets. This can lead to lower productivity and higher turnover rates.

Micro-managing sends the message that you don’t trust your team members to do their jobs correctly. It hampers their ability to grow, learn, and take ownership of their work.

Instead of scrutinizing every detail, focus on setting clear expectations and provide guidance when needed. Trust your team to handle the rest.

This will not only free up your time but also empower your team members and foster a more positive work environment.

4) Neglecting mindfulness

In our busy, fast-paced world, we often get so caught up in the hustle that we forget to take a moment to just be. This neglect of mindfulness can lead to poor decision-making and increased stress levels.

Now, you might be thinking, what does mindfulness have to do with leadership?

Well, a lot actually.

In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“, I delve into the concept of mindfulness and its profound impact on leadership.

Buddhism teaches us the importance of being present and fully engaged in the current moment.

This level of awareness allows leaders to make more thoughtful decisions, respond rather than react to challenges, and truly listen to their team members.

Practicing mindfulness also reduces stress and improves emotional intelligence, two crucial aspects for effective leadership.

So if you’re constantly rushing from one task to another, remember to slow down. Take a moment to breathe, center yourself and be fully present.

5) Avoiding difficult conversations

I’ve always been someone who likes to keep the peace.

Conflict or confrontation? Not my cup of tea.

So, for a long time, I avoided difficult conversations like the plague.

But here’s the thing: avoiding tough conversations doesn’t make the issues go away. It just allows them to fester and grow, creating an undercurrent of tension that can be felt by everyone on the team.

As a leader, it’s your job to address these issues head-on.

It’s not easy, trust me. It can be uncomfortable and even painful at times. But it’s necessary for the health of your team and the success of your projects.

The key is to approach these conversations with empathy and respect, aiming for resolution rather than blame. And remember, it’s okay to feel uncomfortable. That’s where growth happens.

So even if you’re like me and would rather avoid conflict, don’t. Tackle those difficult conversations head-on and watch how your leadership skills improve.

6) Being overly optimistic

You might think that as a leader, it’s your job to keep spirits high and maintain a positive outlook. While there’s truth to that, being overly optimistic can actually hinder your leadership.

Over-optimism can blind you to potential problems and challenges, causing you to underestimate risks and overestimate your team’s capabilities.

This can lead to unrealistic expectations and inevitable disappointments.

Instead of painting everything rosy, aim for a balance between optimism and realism.

Yes, share the vision, inspire and motivate your team. But also acknowledge the challenges ahead.

Being honest about potential roadblocks not only prepares your team but also builds trust. They’ll appreciate your transparency and feel more equipped to face whatever comes their way.

7) Failing to delegate

As leaders, we often feel the need to have our hands in every aspect of our team’s work. But this can lead to a bottleneck effect, stifling your team’s progress and exhausting you in the process.

Delegation is a crucial skill in leadership. It not only lightens your workload but also empowers your team members, giving them the opportunity to develop new skills and take on greater responsibilities.

The key is to delegate wisely.

Assign tasks based on individual strengths and capabilities, provide clear instructions, and trust your team to deliver.

Remember that being a leader isn’t about doing all the work yourself. It’s about guiding your team towards successful outcomes.

So let go of that urge to control everything and start delegating effectively.

8) Neglecting self-care

The final habit to say goodbye to, and arguably the most important, is neglecting self-care.

As a leader, you might feel the need to always be “on”, sacrificing your personal time and well-being for the sake of the job. But remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health is crucial. It’s what fuels you to perform at your best and lead with compassion and clarity.

So whether it’s regular exercise, healthy eating, sufficient sleep or simply taking time off to unwind, make sure you prioritize your well-being. A healthier you is a better leader.

Final thoughts: Leadership is a journey

Becoming a better leader isn’t about working harder or holding onto outdated habits—it’s about being self-aware and willing to make the changes that will help you truly connect with your team.

Letting go of these 8 habits won’t just help you earn respect; it will also help you build stronger, more trusting relationships with those you lead.

From personal experience, I can tell you that when you shift your approach, your team will notice—and so will your results.

In my book “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“, I delve deeper into how Buddhist principles can help you on this journey.

The lessons shared can guide you towards becoming a more compassionate and effective leader.

But for now, reflect on these eight habits we’ve discussed. How many do you recognize in yourself? And what can you do to change them today?