If you genuinely want to find your soulmate one day, say goodbye to these 8 behaviors

Finding your soulmate, that special someone with whom you feel an incredible connection, is something most of us dream about.

But it seems like an elusive dream that’s just out of reach. You’ve tried everything, from dating apps to blind dates set up by well-meaning friends, but nothing seems to work.

Sometimes the problem isn’t the lack of good people out there, but the behaviors and habits that we hold onto.

These patterns might be comfortable, familiar even, but they could be the very things keeping us from finding true love.

It’s not always easy to let go of these behaviors.

They’re a part of who we are and changing them can feel like losing a piece of ourselves. But if we’re serious about finding our soulmate, about creating a lasting relationship based on mutual love and respect, then change is necessary.

Here’s a look at eight behaviors you might need to say goodbye to if you’re genuinely interested in finding your soulmate one day.

You might be surprised at what’s standing in your way.

1) Holding onto past relationships

First and foremost, if you’re genuinely interested in finding your soulmate, it’s crucial to let go of past relationships.

This goes beyond merely not talking to your exes. It’s about not letting the memories, the hurts, and the joys of past relationships hinder your journey to find that special someone.

The thing is, when we hold onto the past, we don’t leave room for the new to come into our lives. It’s like trying to pour fresh water into a cup that’s already full.

Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting or denying that these relationships happened.

They are a part of your history, and they’ve shaped who you are as a person today. But if you’re constantly looking back, you’ll miss what’s right in front of you.

So how do you let go?

Start by acknowledging the experiences and emotions tied to these past relationships. Accept them as part of your journey and make peace with them. Then make a conscious effort to focus on the present and the possibilities it brings.

Remember, your soulmate won’t be found in your past, but in your future.

Letting go of past relationships is the first step towards making space for that future.

2) Fear of being vulnerable

Another behavior that can keep you from finding your soulmate is the fear of being vulnerable.

To be honest, I’ve struggled with this one myself.

After a particularly painful breakup, I built walls around my heart. I convinced myself that if I didn’t let anyone in, I couldn’t get hurt.

But that’s not how love works, is it? It’s about being open, about sharing your fears and hopes, your dreams and your insecurities.

There was a time when I met this amazing person who seemed to tick all the boxes. They were kind, intelligent, and we shared similar interests.

But whenever they tried to get close, to really know me, I’d pull away. I was so scared of getting hurt again that I didn’t realize I was pushing away someone who could have been my soulmate.

Vulnerability is terrifying. There’s no guarantee that the person you open up to won’t hurt you.

But the truth is, you can’t find your soulmate if you’re not willing to take that risk. It’s about trusting yourself enough to know that even if it doesn’t work out, you’ll be okay.

3) Believing that perfection exists

Oscar Wilde once said, “To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.” This quote carries profound wisdom, especially when we’re talking about finding our soulmate.

Now, you might wonder what loving oneself has to do with perfection. Well, everything.

See, the idea of perfection is a double-edged sword.

On one side, it makes us believe that there’s this perfect person out there who will fulfill all our dreams and expectations. On the other side, it makes us strive to be perfect ourselves, thinking that’s the only way we can attract our soulmate.

Both these beliefs are fundamentally flawed.

There’s no such thing as a perfect person.

Everyone has their quirks, their flaws, their unique traits that make them who they are. When I learned to accept and love myself for who I am, warts and all, I realized that I didn’t need to find a perfect person to be my soulmate.

I just needed someone who loved and accepted me for who I am, imperfections included.

So, if you’ve been holding onto this belief in perfection, it’s time to let it go.

Embrace yourself and others for who they are, not who you think they should be.

4) Always waiting for the ‘right’ time

There’s a psychology term called “paralysis by analysis.” It’s when we overthink a situation so much that we end up doing nothing at all. This can be a massive roadblock when it comes to finding our soulmate.

You might be thinking, “I’ll start dating once I lose weight,” or “I’ll put myself out there when I’m more financially secure.” But here’s the thing – there will never be a perfect time.

The planets are not going to align one day and provide you with the ideal circumstances to meet your soulmate. Life is messy, unpredictable, and full of surprises. And often, it’s in these imperfect moments that we find the most beautiful connections.

By waiting for the ‘right’ time, you’re essentially putting your life on hold. You’re missing out on opportunities to meet new people, to learn more about yourself, and yes, to potentially meet your soulmate.

5) Ignoring your own needs

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my quest to find my soulmate, it’s the importance of understanding and respecting my own needs.

It’s easy to get caught up in the idea of finding ‘the one’ and lose sight of what we truly want and need in a partner.

We might overlook red flags, ignore our gut feelings, or even change ourselves in an attempt to make the relationship work.

But here’s the truth – a soulmate is someone who complements you, not completes you. They are someone who respects your needs, understands your wants, and loves you for who you are.

There was a time when I found myself compromising my needs and wants in a relationship, thinking that love was all about sacrifices.

But then I realized that true love isn’t about losing yourself; it’s about being with someone who helps you become the best version of yourself.

6) Living in fantasy

Picture this: A romantic date, candlelit dinner, soft music playing in the background, and the person sitting across from you is everything you ever dreamed of.

Sounds perfect, doesn’t it?

But here’s the catch – life is not a movie and relationships are not always filled with grand gestures and perfect moments.

Living in a fantasy can be one of the biggest barriers to finding your soulmate. When our minds are clouded by unrealistic expectations and idealized notions of romance, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

The truth is, real relationships involve real people, and real people are flawed. They have bad days, they make mistakes, and they might not always say the right things.

But that’s what makes love beautiful – it’s about accepting the imperfections and finding beauty in the messiness of life.

So if you find yourself constantly daydreaming about a fairy-tale romance or comparing your relationships to those in romantic movies or novels, it’s time to come back to reality.

Real love is far more beautiful than any fantasy, because it’s real, it’s raw, and it’s uniquely yours.

7) Not valuing your self-worth

Through all the ups and downs of dating and searching for your soulmate, it’s easy to lose sight of one crucial aspect – your self-worth.

Your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see it. It’s a statement I’ve had to remind myself of time and again. In the pursuit of love, I’ve sometimes settled for less than I deserve, mistaking attention for affection, or confusion for complexity.

But here’s the thing – your soulmate will recognize your worth without you having to prove it. They will respect you, value you, and treat you with the kindness and love you deserve.

So if you’re constantly feeling undervalued in your relationships, it’s time to take a step back and reassess. Remember, you deserve someone who sees your worth clearly and treats you accordingly. Never settle for less.

8) Not being open to love

I saved this for the last because, in my opinion, it’s the most important point. If you genuinely want to find your soulmate one day, you need to be open to love.

Sounds simple enough, right?

But you’d be surprised at how many of us, subconsciously or not, keep love at arm’s length. Maybe it’s because of past heartbreaks, or fear of rejection, or simply not believing we’re worthy of love.

But here’s what I’ve learned: Love can’t find its way in if we don’t let it.

I’ve had my share of heartbreaks and disappointments. There were times when I thought I’d never open my heart again. But I realized that by doing so, I was only depriving myself of the chance to experience love, real love.

So take a chance on love. Yes, you might get hurt. Yes, it might not work out. But when it does, when you finally meet your soulmate, you’ll realize that it was all worth it.

Because the love you’ll share with them will be like nothing else you’ve ever experienced.

So be open to love, embrace it with open arms, and who knows? Your soulmate could be just around the corner.