6 habits of people who are perpetually unhappy in life, according to psychology

We all know that happiness isn’t about always feeling good; life has its ups and downs.

But for some people, unhappiness is like a constant companion, and it goes deeper than a bad day or a rough patch.

Such unhappiness often stems not from circumstances but from specific habits and mindsets that, over time, become self-sabotaging.

Today, we look at six of these common habits that can make life feel heavier than it needs to be.

Let’s dive in.

1) Constant comparison

It’s human nature to look at what others have and feel a sense of longing.

However, there will always be someone with more success, a better job, or a happier relationship.

When this becomes a regular habit, it can overshadow our own achievements and joys, leading us down the path of constant dissatisfaction and unhappiness.

Sound familiar?

This habit could be a major contributor to your unhappiness.

Instead of looking at others, as advised by clinical psychologist Dr Jordan Peterson, try to “compare yourself to who you were yesterday”.

2) Dwelling on the past

I’ve personally found that dwelling on the past is a habit that can hold a strong grip over our happiness.

I remember a time when I would constantly replay past mistakes and regrets in my head.

It was like a movie on constant repeat, pulling my focus and energy away from the present moment.

Every time I thought about these past regrets, I felt a wave of sadness and disappointment wash over me.

Little did I know at the time, this is well acknowledged by experts.

As noted by the folks at The American Psychiatric Association, this habit “can contribute to the development of depression or anxiety and can worsen existing conditions.”

The past is something we can’t change, no matter how much we wish we could.

By dwelling on it, we’re not only robbing ourselves of the joy in the present, but also hindering our ability to create a happier future.

Breaking free from this cycle requires conscious effort, but it’s absolutely worth it.

Trust me, once you start focusing more on the present and less on what’s behind you, your level of happiness will start to rise.

3) Neglecting self-care

When was the last time you did something just for yourself?

If you can’t remember, that’s a big red flag. Self-care isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity.

According to mental health counselor Dr. Shainna Ali, “Neglecting personal care can cause increases in anxiety, distractibility, anger, and fatigue.”

In other words, overlooking your own needs can have serious mental and physical consequences.

So, what does self-care look like?

Well, it can be as simple as setting aside 15 minutes each day to do something that recharges you—whether that’s reading a book, taking a walk, or practicing a hobby you enjoy.

For some, self-care might mean turning off notifications and taking time to disconnect from screens.

For others, it could mean booking a therapy session or catching up on rest.

The key is to schedule these small moments of care into your routine, making them a priority rather than an afterthought.

The truth is, when you make time for yourself, you’re not only nurturing your happiness but building the resilience you need to navigate life’s ups and downs.

4) Focusing on the negative

You’ve probably noticed that those who are always unhappy often have a tendency to magnify the negative and minimize the positive.

For example, they might dwell on a single critical comment while ignoring several compliments or focusing solely on what went wrong in a day rather than what went right.

This habit of negativity can create a distorted view of reality, where the bad always seems to outweigh the good.

It can suck the joy out of life and leave us feeling perpetually unhappy.

5) Skipping exercise

“I’ll get to it over the weekend”, “I am too tired today”…Sound familiar?

Skipping exercise might seem harmless in the short term, but over time, it can take a real toll on our mood and energy levels.

As noted by Healthline, regular physical activity boosts mood, reduces stress, and lowers the risk of depression and anxiety.

I’ll admit, I’ve fallen into this trap before.

There was a period where I put exercise on the back burner, telling myself I’d “get back to it next week.”

But as the weeks turned into months, I started noticing my energy dip, my focus fade, and my stress levels spike.

Getting back into an exercise routine wasn’t easy, but once I did, the impact on my mood and overall happiness was undeniable.

Exercise doesn’t have to be extreme.

It could mean a brisk walk, a short yoga session, or even a dance break in the living room.

The key is finding something you enjoy and making it a consistent part of your life.

6) Overlooking the importance of relationships

This is the last one on this list but perhaps the most important.

Human connection isn’t just a nice-to-have; it’s essential to our well-being.

This has been backed up by research time and time again.

For instance, the Harvard Study of Adult Development—a remarkable 80-year study—found that quality relationships are one of the strongest predictors of long-term happiness and health.

Cultivating relationships takes time and effort, but the rewards are invaluable.

Whether it’s setting aside time for a weekly call with a friend, organizing a family dinner, or even just reaching out more often, making relationships a priority can make life feel richer and more fulfilling.

Final thoughts: The power of habits

While we can’t always change our circumstances, we can choose how we respond to them.

By letting go of constant comparison, releasing the past, prioritizing self-care, focusing on the positive, moving our bodies, and nurturing our relationships, we can create a foundation for a happier, more balanced life.

Changing these habits isn’t easy—it takes time, patience, and self-compassion.

But every small step toward self-awareness and positive change can make a difference.

Here’s to letting go of what holds us back and embracing what truly brings us joy!

Feeling stuck in self-doubt?

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Ava Sinclair

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